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time warp

It’s midnight in NY, unseasonably cool and raining. I missed my flight to LA. I’m sitting on a very hard chair, 5 cups of coffee and a piece of red velvet cake later, outside the 24hour Terminal 4 Diner. Music, movies and writing help me pass the night away while I wait for the 7am flight I am now booked on.

I took this photo at Ghost Ranch, New Mexico. I’ve been musing on these words: “objects in the mirror are closer than they appear” for over a month now. Is this a metaphor for human experience?

When you look in the “rear view mirror” of your life, are the people, experiences and things of your past closer than they appear or do they appear closer than they are? Here’s my proposal: in driving it is one way and in life it is the opposite.

When I reminisce, distant moments of my life seem as if they happened yesterday. It was just a few months (29 years) ago, that I walked down the aisle; a few weeks (26 and 20 years) ago, my kids were born; a few days (11 years) ago we moved from the beach into Los Angeles; a few hours (8 years) ago, since we moved into our dream home; a few minutes (5 years) ago since the filming of Getting to the Nutcracker (featuring my son with snip-its of my husband and I in it, and which I watched again tonight to pass the time); and a second (1 year) ago, my youngest started college. Objects in the rear view mirror of life are definitely further than they appear!

And what about the future? How does that appear? All the hopes, dreams, plans and things yet to happen? Remember when the end of the school year felt like it would never arrive, when it seemed like your first born would never get out of diapers, when you thought you’d never be able to afford a house? Will I ever recover from this disappointment or loss? Will I ever find a job or career I love? Will I ever find true love?

The greater the anticipation, the wanting, the projection, the further away it seems. But these objects ahead of us, on the other side of the mirror, are actually closer than they appear. They will be here before we know it!

Time and space warp; mind tricks!

Oh, father time

That meter maid who lends one lively winking eye

We dance a borrowed jig while hiding from the fine

Oh, what I wouldn’t spend to lend you mine

Nobody knows where they are going

Oh, how we try to wrap our minds

Over the edge of all our knowings

Be it a bang of the divine

Tip of my iceberg, blues are showing

I’ve never been one for goodbyes

So, till I meet you there, I’m singing

A traveling song to ease the ride and so you know

Everywhere I roam

I’ll see you on the road

Ryn Weaver

Here’s what I’m sure of, when I get on the plane tomorrow morning, this incredibly long night spent with hundreds of strangers all biding time at JFK will feel like a nanosecond in my rear view mirror.

photo by Lynne Bernstein ©2017


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